When heavy-petting animal lovers say they want to fuck beaver, eat pussy, suck cocks, or bang hot bitches, they aren't speaking euphemistically. Zoophiles bark about their favorite creature comforts.

by Dan Kapelovitz

For as long as she can remember, Justine, a 37-year-old Seattle resident, has had sexual longings for dogs. At age 19, while house-sitting for friends of the family, opportunity barked. The homeowner's horny hound began humping Justine, rubbing his erect doggie-dick up and down her leg. Realizing her dream could finally come true, Justine parted her thighs and let the pooch penetrate her until the beast shot his spunk up the beauty's snatch.

After her first Fido-fucking encounter, Justine lived 16 years of self-imposed bestial celibacy. "I had very mixed emotions about what had taken place," remembers Justine. "I suppressed my feelings and what I had done for many years "

Shamed, Justine thought she was the only one who craved canine cock until three years ago, when she logged onto the Internet and discovered that others engaged in puppy love. With newfound confidence and a "sweet and loving black Lab," Justine ventured once again into the world of bow-wow lovemaking.

"My [current] male dog companion has really no interest in having intercourse with me," says Justine. "But he often wants me to jack him off. I have on occasion sucked him off as well, which he also enjoys."

When Phillip Buble of Piscataquis County, Maine, was 13, he fell in love with the family dog, a mutt named Taffy. Buble is a 44-year-old, unemployed "zoophile" (the pet name, along with "zoosexual" and just plain "zoo" that modern-day animal fuckers prefer to call themselves). For Buble, sex with animals isn't a casual affair; while he admits to a few one-night stands with dogs, he considers any long-term canine sex partner to be his non-lawfully-wedded wife. Currently, Buble is "married" to a 34-pound female mutt named Lady Buble, a Chihuahua/German shepherd mix.

Because Buble prefers small dogs, he often finds full penetration difficult. "In Lady's case, I can get the tip of my penis in her, and she very much likes that kind of tickling and teasing. My favorite is oral sex, both giving and receiving, especially anal rimming. Lady, for example, absolutely loves getting as [far] as she can up my ass with her tongue."

Buble, who puts his personal twist to the expression "man's best friend," is convinced that a dog's pussy is the sweetest-tasting thing in the world. "It's indescribable, and it doesn't smell like fish."

In terms of pooch-pumping, Buble is no homophobe--he doinks male and female dogs with equal relish. "A dog's semen is kind of sweet and sour," he says. The canine-exclusive bisexual enjoys dog cock up the butt, but admits that the unique flavor of mutt anus is an acquired taste.

Although dogs are the most popular animal sex object, the species is not alone in attracting human fanciers. A Seattle man nicknamed Mule often stands on water buckets in order to fuck fillies from behind, and says he'll take horse twat over human pussy any day. "It's definitely not so snug, but a little bit warmer [than human pussy]," says Mule. "That's something I really like."

In his "sexual autobiography" The Horseman, the late George Willard sings the praises of his horse Cherry's vagina. "She's got that clenching action. It smells and tastes better, too. [It has] an earthy, rich, musky aroma."

Calafin, a 20-year-old dolphin fanatic from Florida, wouldn't dream of fucking a horse or a dog. "Dolphins are the only ones that are really intelligent enough to have a full relationship with," he says.

Calafin insists that dolphins have the greatest poontang in the animal kingdom. "[Dolphin pussy] is designed so it can handle a member that's larger, but because it's so muscular, it can literally make it tighter than any human [vagina]. Anything a human can do with her hand, a female dolphin can do with her pussy. It's like having a tunnel made of tongues licking at you all at once, surrounding you."

According to Calafin, dolphins not only have the best cooze, they also utilize their sonar to further enhance sexual pleasure. "You know how girls go crazy if you rub their clit? A dolphin could make that thing vibrate like a tweeter on a speaker."

Not all animal fuckers are so species-specific in their passions. Bestial porn star Bodil Joensen, for one, engages in hot sex with many of God's creatures, great and small. Joensen was a farm girl in Denmark who simply enjoyed having sex with her animals. In 1970, in need of money, Joensen answered an ad seeking a XXX model and began posing with her menagerie. Word quickly spread of this woman who fucked dogs, horses and boars in front of the camera. Filmmakers came from all parts of the world to capture the precious moments, making Joensen an internationally famous porn star.

Many animal lovers glamorize interspecies sex, but when animals attack, zoophilia can be downright dangerous. "I was kicked in the head during an argument between two horses once," says Mule. "I'm lucky to be talking to you right now."

Dog lovers must be careful too. If not, they could be clawed. Dog-fucking porn actress Chessie Moore (star of Lucky Dog and This Dog Loves to Fuck) tapes socks over her co-stars' paws. Purists, however, reject such measures. "Having socks on the dog is totally ridiculous," scoffs Buble. "Scratches are a badge of honor for canine zoos. If you have sex with dogs, you're gonna get scratched."

Canine fornication can be more hazardous than receiving a few claw marks. Dogs have a knot at the base of their penises, known as the bulbus glandis, that expands during intercourse. In dog-to-dog sex, the bulbus glandis creates a genital "lock" and facilitates insemination. During interspecies couplings, the knot can wreak havoc: One zoophile was taking his dog's cock up his ass when he heard someone coming up the stairs. He quickly pulled away, tearing open his sphincter muscles.

Diseases are another peril of animal fucking. "While standard STDs--syphilis, gonorrhea, herpes--are human-to-human, not animal-to-human," says a doctor, who wished to remain anonymous, "any zoonotic diseases [those transmitted between animals and humans] that people could get through casual contact with animals, they could also get through sex."

Zoophiles should be particularly careful when eating out animal anuses. Bestial oral copulators can acquire parasites, such as tapeworms, from their lovers' excrement. Pregnant women, especially, should never perform anilingus on a cat; feline feces can cause toxoplasmosis, an infection that can pass from mother to fetus, often resulting in mental retardation and other birth defects.

Animals can be injured by fucking humans as well. Canine vaginas expand during mating periods, but fucking a bitch during the rest of the year could cause serious harm. Many animals that bestialists lust after are too small, even when in heat, to accommodate the relatively large human phalluses. In his classic book Psychopathia Sexualis, Richard von Krafft-Ebing writes of a 16-year-old boy who sodomized rabbits, leaving them with torn rectums. Sometimes animals are injured by the restraints that their human sex partners use on them. According to a fact sheet distributed by the Humane Society of the United States, "chickens [are] decapitated to increase the abuser's sexual pleasure."

Bestiality has existed as long as man and beast have roamed the earth together, and has been condemned at least as far back as the days of the Old Testament. ("If a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death," cautions Leviticus 20:15.) Today's animal lovers are demanding equal rights, arguing that they are a sexual minority, just like gays and lesbians.

Claire Ponder, manager of the Humane Society of the United States' First Strike Campaign, which is dedicated to ending animal sexual abuse, believes any form of human-beast sex is wrong. "Sex with an animal can never be consensual. The idea that the animals enjoy it, when, in fact, they often suffer substantial injuries or even death, is somewhat ludicrous to me."

Ponder equates interspecies sex with pedophilia, in that both animals and children cannot truly give consent. Zoophiles, however, draw an important distinction between bestiality and zoophilia. "Bestiality is like rape," says Calafin. "Bestiality is fucking an animal, regardless of how they feel about it, whereas zoophilia is essentially a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. One just happens to have a tail, or fur, or more or less than two legs."

A dog lover who goes by the moniker Perrin agrees. "Animals of age, unlike children, are sexually mature," maintains Perrin, who first tasted the joys of bestiality when he performed oral sex on a friend's female Lab. "They enjoy sex and have no emotional hang-ups about it. They will not be scarred like a child, and they are fully capable of asking for sex themselves."

Zoophiles contend that consent is given nonverbally, through body language. "If you've ever tried to trim a dog's nails or put a horse into a trailer, you know whether or not an animal is consenting to an activity," says Gary, a 35-year-old engineer from Seattle, Washington, who enjoys cuddling, massaging, masturbating, licking and mounting dogs. "Would anyone doubt that I can know that my dog enjoys being scratched behind the ears and does not enjoy being given a bath?"

To avoid trouble, many zoos favor staying in the closet. "Bestiality won't be accepted by the mainstream in the U.S. in our lives," says Gary. "Keeping a low profile is our best bet for avoiding becoming society's scapegoats."

Phillip Buble did not keep a low-enough profile, and was nearly beaten to death with a crowbar by his 71-year-old father after Phillip came out as a zoosexual.

"He only got nine months for premeditated attempted murder," says the younger Buble. "But that's okay, because he didn't need a lot of jail time; what he needs is therapy."

While most others would insist that the zoosexuals are the ones in need of therapy, zoos aver that they are victims of a close-minded society that would rather persecute animal lovers than understand them.

"The way we are being treated right now is the way homosexuals were treated back in the olden days," says Calafin. "It's the way African Americans were treated back before the Civil War. We're just getting persecuted because we're different. And if one of us stands up and says, ‘I'm a zoo. I want this law repealed,' you're in the slammer; they'll find some bogus charge to toss you in jail, and once you get in prison you are dead."

Currently, bestiality is illegal in 24 states (plus Washington, D.C., and Puerto Rico), with penalties ranging anywhere from a small fine to 20 years in prison. State legislators in Missouri, Oregon, Illinois, Nevada, Iowa and Maine have all recently introduced bills outlawing bestiality.

Greg Myers, a 35-year-old paralegal from Arnold, Missouri, and president of ASAIRS (the Animal Sexual Abuse Information and Resource Site), spends three to four hours a night on the computer, encouraging citizens to implore their legislators to ban zoophilia. "A lot of your old bestiality laws were incorporated under those morality laws or statutes against sodomy that the homosexual community advocates against," explains Myers. "When a legislature takes a sodomy law off the books, what they fail to realize is that they just made bestiality legal in their state."

When crafting anti-bestiality laws, legislators must also contend with the animal-husbandry industry. Last year, an anti-bestiality bill in Missouri died in committee after horse breeders and puppy-mill owners opposed the measure, fearing that the law might interfere with their profits. State representatives Catherine Hanaway and Katherine Hollingsworth reintroduced the bill, this time including an animal-husbandry exemption. (Neither representative would talk to HUSTLER about their controversial bill.)

Even in states without anti-bestiality laws on the books, beast boffing can still result in incarceration. In October 2000, Robert A. Broderson, of Waterloo, Iowa, was arrested for criminal trespass and animal abuse after students of Hawkeye Community College found him hiding in the college's farm hayloft, naked. In the corner was a sheep whose hindquarters were tied up, ready for action. Next to the sheep, police found a blue nightgown. Apparently, the students arrived too late--the college's farm manager examined the ewe and determined she no longer had virgin wool.

Daniel Bruce House, 55, is another animal fucker who crossed paths with the law. House, known as "the Carrot Man" because he sold carrots to horse owners in Agoura, California, was arrested on June 6, 1999, for allegedly sexually assaulting horses. In August 2000, House pleaded no contest to two felony counts of animal cruelty and two misdemeanor counts of sexual assault on animals. He was sentenced to four years in prison, with more than a year of time served.

House's defense attorney, Michael Rotsten, who specializes in animal cases, thinks California's anti-bestiality laws are arbitrary. "It's all right to shove an electric rod up a fox's butt and electrocute it, but if somebody were to walk up to the animal and masturbate it, they would be a criminal."

Rotsten believes his client was the victim of a modern-day witch hunt. Although there were no eyewitnesses and the case against House was based solely on circumstantial evidence, Rotsten advised his client to accept the plea agreement.

Despite their calls for legislative proscriptions, some anti-bestiality factions question the value of prison without treatment. "I don't really look at it like a crime," says Mike Rolland (an assumed name), the founder and ex-president of ASAIRS. "It's more like a psychiatric crime, but they should be incarcerated while they are being treated, and all of their animals should be removed from their possession. Slamming people in jail and letting them out in five years is not going to do any good. A lot of people who have been caught go right back out and do this again." Even so, Rolland wants bestiality outlawed in all 50 states.

Rolland is one of the most controversial characters in the animal-sex scene. Although the 41-year-old Iowan admits to having masturbated or performed oral sex on more than 100 dogs, beginning at age nine with his sister's German shepherd, today Rolland is one of bestiality's most avid critics.

"Being involved with zoophilia was like being in a cult," remembers Rolland, who found himself spending more than 18 hours a day on his computer, perusing animal-sex forums. "It tends to brainwash you after a while. The only people you associate with are people who think the same way you do."

A friend convinced Rolland to seek professional help. With the assistance of a therapist, Rolland quit fucking and sucking his pets. Embarking on a one-man crusade against zoophilia, the recovering zoophile contacted law-enforcement agencies to shut down illegal bestiality porn sites, and encouraged animal-rights groups to lobby for anti-bestiality legislation.

Many zoophiles believe the ASAIRS campaign has done more harm than good. Canine Casanova, who was forced to relocate his Web site after Rolland contacted his Internet service provider, blames Rolland for the suicide of Steve Arlow. Arlow was a prominent pro-zoo advocate who posted how-to guides on the Internet, such as "How to Have Sex With Geese."

"A lot of them blame Mike [Rolland] because he uncovered that Arlow was using the University of Michigan's computers to distribute that stuff," says Greg Myers, Rolland's successor as president of ASAIRS. Rolland contends that there is no connection, pointing out that the suicide occurred in February, five months after he alerted authorities.

Even before the Arlow incident, zoos had declared war on Rolland. To learn his true identity, zoos hacked into Rolland's America Online account, then distributed his real name and address. To this day, Rolland receives numerous death threats.

Considering the social, legal and health hazards, why do people become zoophiles? According to the Humane Society of the United States, bestial practitioners fall into three categories: the opportunistic, who experiment sexually with animals, using them as a substitute for human beings; the sadistic, who feel empowered by abusing animals or forcing others, usually women and children, to have sex with animals; and the fixated, who take the natural affection for one's pet to unnatural extremes.

"Bestiality is a social cop-out," opines Rolland. "Zoophilia is partly caused by low self-esteem, social phobia and shyness. It becomes a revenge back at society because society doesn't approve of it. It's like the ultimate insult to your parents--you have sex with dogs, and they're not gonna have any grandkids."

Contrary to Rolland's theories, Justine bones dogs and simultaneously maintains a healthy relationship with a human being. "I thoroughly enjoy human sexuality, and I have currently been with the same man for 15 years," she says. "[Canines and humans] both have things to offer that the other doesn't."

Besides suggesting to Justine and other bestialists that they are "normal," the Internet is playing a major role in connecting zoophiles with each other and with their jack-off material. Animal fuck fans who once traveled to Denmark to buy beasty porn are now just a mouse click away from snake-fucking videos. Zoo support groups are popping up all over the Internet with advice on how to boink dogs, horses, sheep, pigs, geese and more.

"A hawk will respond sexually to being licked, if you do it just right," reads an online, how-to-fuck-raptors guide. "In order to keep the hawk calm, you will want to have sex in a low--or no--light area. A place I prefer is in my shower. The constant sound of the water prevents the bird from being disturbed by other sounds, plus it is very relaxing."

Rolland thinks the Internet deceives people into believing sex with animals is acceptable behavior. "The bandwidth on the Internet is so wide now that any sick person can find other sick people who think just like they do," says Rolland. "You can find Ku Klux Klan members, you have NAMBLA [North American Man-Boy Love Association], and forums for necrophiliacs."

Despite the anti-zoo faction's efforts, beast-banging Web smut remains a low prosecutorial priority.

"The federal codes would consider bestiality hard-core obscenity, but the FBI doesn't enforce it," says ASAIRS's Myers. "I've even contacted some ISPs in the United States because they had bestiality material on their sites, and they boldly laughed and said, ‘The FBI just audited our system, and they didn't say anything about bestiality; they were interested in the child porn.' "

An FBI spokeswoman said that when they do find illegal bestial porn, they forward the information to local prosecutors, but confirmed that they are more concerned with child pornography.

Surprisingly, many zoophiles join animal-rights activists in their opposition to bestiality porn. Canine Casanova opposes feral fuck flicks because the films objectify the critters, and is sickened by the mistreatment of the animal porn stars.

"Things are done to elicit behavior," explains Casanova. "For instance, they allow a dog to become dehydrated so he will lick almost constantly."

Although Mule collects amateur bestiality videos made by his horse-fucking friends, he prefers to watch nature videos of animals mating: "The Discovery Channel is the greatest thing to come along for zoo people in a long time."



(This article first appeared in the September 2001 issue of Hustler Magazine)



Click here to go back to articles page.